THE SEX GODDESS' FIRST LOVE CHAPTERS 38-39-40

Chapter Thirty Eight

"Hi mom, hi dad. Miss me?" I said in a cheerful voice. Naabutan ko sila ni Olivia sa veranda na nag-aalmusal. They turned their heads and their eyes lit up when they saw me.

"Andi." Dad smiled from ear to ear. I tried my best not to roll my eyes. "I'm so happy to see you, sweetheart."

"From now on, you'll see me everyday, dad. I'm staying here." And I'll make your life a living hell. I had to literally bite my tongue to keep those words from spilling out of my mouth.

"Andi, Anak..." He got up from his seat at inalalayan siya ni Olivia. They both walked towards me and hugged me. Ugh! I wanted to push them away from me, these people are murderers, I had to remind myself that this is all for the show. I had to do this.

"You don't know how happy I am." Dad cupped my face and kissed me on the forehead. "Sana mapatawad mo na ako. Pinagsisi-"

"I've already forgiven you, dad, mom. Let's just forget about what happened." I managed to say with a smile. Although saying that felt like acid burning in my throat. It still hurts to talk about it.

"Oh darling..." He hugged me again. When Harold broke out of the hug, si Olivia naman ang lumapit sa akin.

"We're so sorry. We love you so much, sweety." She looked at my face before giving me a hug.

"I'm s-sorry din sa inasal ko sa ospital."

"No, baby. It's okay, we understand." Olivia said.

I joined them for breakfast. And I had to actually have a conversation with them. I was having a conversation with the people who killed my child. The two of them were so happy, little did they know that I only came back to ruin their lives. Just like how they ruined mine. After finishing my breakfast, I excused myself and went to my room.

Pag-akyat ko sa kwarto ko nandoon na ang mga luggage na ipinaakyat ko kanina sa maid. Wala pa rin halos pinagbago ang kwarto ko. It was left the way I had seen it before I went to New York. Umupo ako sa gilid ng kama at biglang tumunog ang phone ko.

Kinuha ko ang phone ko from my pocket. Jason's name appeared on the screen. I clicked the answer button. "Hello, husband."

"Wife." I heard him chuckle on the other end. "Oh Andi."

"Bumalik na ako sa mansyon." Sabi ko.

"Good." He said.

"But, God, Jason, I can't stand breathing the same air as them." I complained.

"It will all pay off in the end."

I rolled my eyes. "Easy for you to say."

"Don't worry, Andi. Once I finish all my work, babalik ako d'yan sa Pilipinas para matulungan kita sa plano mo."

We talked for a few more minutes before ending the call.

"Hi, Phoenix!" We hugged when we saw each other. This is the first time we've seen each other again after so many years. He called me the other night and asked me to go to the company's social event with him and I said yes. Now, he is here to pick me up.

"Hi." He said while staring at me from head to foot. "You look great, Andi."

I'm wearing a long burgundy dress with deep v-neck and high-thigh slit. I've worn it at a photo shoot before and I just loved it so much I had to beg the designer to let me keep it.

"Thank you." I smiled. "You look handsome in that tux." I patted his shoulder and he laughed.

He opened the car door for me and he went to the driver's side.

"Alam mo bang masayang-masaya si uncle Harold habang magkausap kami at sinabi niya sa akin na bumalik ka na dito sa Pilipinas." Phoenix said while driving.

I just shrugged. I didn't say a word.

"Anyway, salamat at pumayag kang sumama sa akin. You don't know how much this means to me." Sabi niya.

"You know I can't say no to you."

When we got to the event, I immediately was three familiar faces. Si Wayne, Si Axel at si Seth. May mga nagkukumpulang mga babae sakanila. Nang makita nila kami they headed straight towards us. Binati nila akong lahat.

"And laki ng pinagbago mo. Why aren't you wearing your big dorky glasses? Nakakapanibago." Wayne said with a laugh.

"I'm wearing contacts."

"I've seen you on the cover of Cosmopolitan." Sabi ni Axel.

"Dude, you read cosmopolitan?" Seth looked at him, weirded out.

"That's so gay." Wayne commented.

"No, I do not read it. One of my girls happened to have a collection of Cosmopolitan magazines. " He said.

After chatting with them for a few minutes bumalik na sila sa mga girls nila. Phoenix got me a glass of champagne. Tumingin ako sa paligid. May isang nawawala sa kanila. And then I saw him. Papalapit siya sa amin at may babae siyang kasama na nakakapit sa braso niya. I gripped the glass I'm holding tightly.

"Hey Phoenix, hey Andi." Bati ni Tristan. Next to him is a beautiful girl wearing an elegant black evening dress that complimented every curve in her body. She has long wavy black hair, a pair of big, brown eyes that made her look innocent and thin lips. She really is beautiful. I have met girls more beautiful than her but, God, I've never felt so insecure in my whole life.

"Hey." Phoenix said while staring at the woman. His eyes were focused on her, only her. She was looking at Phoenix, too. Their eyes were locked with each other. Something is going on between the two of them, I can feel it. I felt a sense of relief at the thought of that.

"Andi, this is Cassie." Tristan placed one arm around her shoulder. I tried to shrug off the annoyance building up inside me. "Cassie meet Andi."

I put on a fake smile. "Nice to meet you, Cassie."

"Nice to meet you, too." She said, smiling back at me.

Dumating ang tatlong lalaki; si Wayne, si Axel at si Seth. They were surprised to see Cassie and they asked Tristan if he and Cassie are dating. Tristan said they aren't and that made me hate her less. Narinig ko rin na ex pala ni Phoenix si Cassie kaya ganun na lang ang tinginan nila sa isa't isa. We went to sit at a table together. Cassie and Tristan are sitting across from us. Cassie kept looking at us, hindi mapalagay ang babae. There was a hint of jealousy in her eyes as she looks at us. Nang makita niyang nakatingin din ako sa kanya, she quickly looked away. She probably thinks I'm his girlfriend. I couldn't help but smile. This is getting interesting. burgundy evening dress

"Hey, Phoenix." Humarap ako sa kanya.

He turned to me and put his arm on the back of my chair. "What?"

"Can I ask you something?" I said, almost whispering.

"What is it?" Tanong niya. He leaned in closer to me.

"Closer." I told him. Lalo niyang nilapit ang mukha niya sa akin.

"Do you think I look like Jessica Rabbit in this dress?" I asked.

He laughed. "God, Andi, that question was so random. Akala ko naman kung ano ang itatanong mo."

Out of my peripheral vision, I can see Cassie frowning. She isn't paying attention to Tristan or anyone. Her eyes were glued to Phoenix. I felt so guilty when I looked at her, hurt evident in her eyes.

They started talking about Phoenix and Cassie's past. Inaasar nang mga lalaki si Phoenix kay Cassie at agad na nagbago ang mood niya. His face hardened. Iginigiit nila na mayroon pa siyang nararamdaman para kay Cassie and Phoenix started saying mean things.

"I never loved her. Nasaktan lang ang ego ko dahil sa tagal kong nagtiyaga sa kanya pero ibang lalaki ang nakina-" He suddenly stopped mid-sentence. Wala ni isa sa amin ang nangahas magsalita. Lahat kami ay nagulat sa sinabi ni Phoenix. At that moment, I wanted to slap the living shit out of him. I kind of wish Cassie would slap her or grab the glass of water in front of her and throw it on him.

I looked at the poor girl. Her face paled. Her eyes started to water. I could tell that she was trying her very best not to cry.

"E-excuse me." She said, her voice quivering, as she got up from the table. Nagmamadali siyang naglakad palayo.

There was an awkard silence after that.

"This is all your fault." Axel whispered to Wayne, but all of us can hear it.

"Woah, dude, don't blame it on me. Nakisali rin naman kayo." Naiiling na sabi Wayne.

"You started it." Sabi naman ni Seth. Para silang mga batang nagsisisihan.

"Shut the fuck up, all of you." Mahina pero mariin na sabi ni Phoenix.

"Way to go, asshole. Way to go." Tristan said, sarcastically. Nagtitigan sila ni Phoenix. After a few seconds, Tristan got up from his seat and walked away. Oh God! Pupuntahan niya si Cassie. I know it isn't right pero naiinis ako. Cassie is the damsel in distress and Tristan is playing the knight in shining armor.

Isa-isang nagtayuan ang tatlong lalaki. Hanggang sa kami na lang ang naiwan ni Phoenix. He stayed quiet and seemed to be in deep thought. I could see the pain and regret written all over his face.

"Phoenix, you should apologize to Cassie." I finally broke the silence.

He just shook his head. "I can't."

" What do you mean you can't? What you did was wrong. You embarrased her in front of your friends and me." Sabi ko sa kanya.

Without saying a word he stood up and walked away. I followed him. Nakita namin si Cassie at Tristan na nag-uusap sa balcony. Lalapit sana namin sila but we both froze when we saw them kiss. Phoenix and I exchanged glances. I wanted to grab that bitch's hair and throw her off the balcony. Phoenix's eyes were cold and burning with fury.

Tumakbo si Cassie papasok at sinundan siya ni Phoenix. I saw him grab her and drag her out of the party.

Bumalik ang tingin ko kay Tristan and he was looking at me. I gave him a cold glare before turning away from him.

"Andi!" I heard him call me. He grabbed my wrist and turned me around to face me.

"Don't touch me." I said in a low voice.

"Andi, what you saw-"

"I don't fucking need your explanation." I said pulling my hand away from his grip.

I hurridly ran out of the room and to the elevator. Tristan was running after me. I quickly pressed the close button but before the elevator door completely close, he reached out his hand so the door opens again. He got on the elevator and door closed.

"Ah, the elevator." He said shaking his head while smiling.

I blushed when I remembered what happened the night I got drugged by the guy I met at the club and he brought me to his condo. Does he really have to remind that? I tried to pretend I was unaffected.

I finally breathed out, like I was holding my breath the whole time, when the elevator stopped at the lobby. Lumabas ako sa hotel and he was still following me.I hailed a taxi and Tristan, pinigilan ako ni Tristan.

"Ihahatid na kita." He said.

Hindi ko siya pinansin at tinawag ko ang pansin ng taxi na parating. The taxi stopped in front of us. I was about to open the door when he slammed it close.

"What the fuck is wrong with you?" I faced him and gave him an angry look.

"There is no way in hell am I going to let you ride a taxi at night in that dress." His eyes scanned my body.

"Huwag mo akong pakialaman."

Just as I was about to open the taxi door again it drove off. Tinitigan ko siya ng masama. "Please, leave me alone."

"Andi, ayan ka na naman. You're going to put yourself in a dangerous situation. Paano kung rapist ang driver ng masakyan mong taxi. Or worse, serial killer." He said calmly. "Come on, I'll drop you off your house."

"You're impossible." I said, shaking my head.

Dahil sa pamimilit at dahil wala naman akong dalang kotse at umalis na si Phoenix kasama si Cassie pumayag na akong ihatid niya ako. We went to his car. A red Bentley. How the hell did he afford to buy such an expensive car? I wonder where he got all his money. I bet he whored himself to a rich widow and he probably killed the widow to get her money or something like that.

He opened the passenger door for me and I went in. He closed the door and jogged around to the driver's seat. Hindi ko na kailangan ituro sa kanya ang direksyon nang mansyon dahil alam niya na. Nakapunta na siya dati doon and he almost didn't make it out alive, he joked. I felt this strange bitter nostalgia when I remembered what happened years ago. When we were so in love with each other, or at least I thought he was in love with me, too. We fell silent. Both of us lost in our thoughts.

Huminto ang kotse sa harap ng gate ng mansyon. Lumapit ang guard sa amin and when he saw me he let us in. I'm sure Harold and Olivia are already asleep by now.

"Would you like to get inside and have some coffee?" Tanong ko.

He looked at me puzzled. I just smiled at him, waiting for his answer. Oh yes, this will be perfect. So perfect.

"Uh, sure." He answered, hesitant.

We both got out of the car and went inside the mansion. It was dark inside because everyone was fast asleep. I walked to the kitchen to make him a cup of coffee and I handed it to him.

"Thanks." He said.

"Sure." I smiled at him.

He drank his coffee but immediately spat it out. "What the hell did you put in my coffee?"

"Mouthwash." I answered. "I will not let you kiss me after you've kissed another woman without washing your mouth."

I cupped his face and kissed him hard. I delved my tongue inside his mouth and he groaned. His arms wrapped around my waist, one hand slowly sliding down to my exposed leg. He lifted my leg up so he could rub his hardness against my crotch.

His hand went inside the slit of my dress until he got to my underwear. He rubbed his palm above my panties and I was grinding myself against him. His other hand slid up to my exposed cleavage and caressed it, slowly making its way inside. I wasn't wearing a bra, his fingers easily found my nipple and pinches it.

His mouth traveled down my neck. Nibbling and sucking my sensitive skin and all I could do was moan. His hand went inside my underwear, tracing his finger on my wet folds. Rubbing it up and down repeatedly. He pulled aside the cloth that covered my breast with his other hand and lowered his head to suck it.

"Oh God, Tristan." I moaned as he suck my nipple and play with my clit. I gasped when he pulled at my nipple with his teeth.

I wanted to protest when he took his hand out of my panties and he stopped sucking my breast. But before I could do so, he turned me around and made me bend over the counter. He lifted my dress up to my stomach.

"Shit." I heard him cursed, silently. I knew why. I was wearing a lacy thong that barely covered me. He fondled my exposed butt cheek before giving it a not-so-hard slap. "Your ass is so sexy."

"You're so wet, baby." He said as he rub his fingers over my panties.

"Oh, Tristan! I want you."

"I know. And I want you, too. So bad." He said hoarsely. He knelt down and started licking me through my panties, running his tongue on my slit. I clutched the edge of the counter tightly, moaning and panting.

He finally pulled my thong down to my knees. His tongue flicked at my clit and I moaned even louder. I felt his finger tease my core making me wiggle. He slowly inserted one finger in and out, in and out, repeatedly. And he added another one. And another one. Soon enough, my legs began to shake and I orgasmed. He licked up all my juice not leaving a single drop. I can't believe this. I just had an orgasm in my parents' kitchen.

He stood up and I hear him unzipping his pants. Then I felt a warm, thick thing rubbing against my slit. I was still sensitive from the orgasm I just had. I screamed out his name, not caring even if the whole house hears it, when he entered his thick shaft inside me. Both his hands went to my breasts and started playing with it. He started by massaging and fondling it, then his fingers went to my nipples and pinched, twisted and pulled it. He rammed himself into me so fast and so hard, again and again.

I could feel another orgasm coming on and I welcomed it. After a few thrust, he shot his hot, sticky cum deep inside me.

"Oh God, Andi, you feel so good." His semi-hard shaft is still inside me while he kisses my nape. He pulled out and I sighed at the emptiness. I could feel his cum dripping out of me when he pulled my thong up and my dress down.

"Thank God, your mom didn't catch us this time." He chuckled.

I turned to face him and he smiled. He hugged me and kissed me on the lips. I could still taste myself on him.

"Goodnight." He whispered in my ears before breaking the hug.

"Sleep with me tonight." I said.

"Are you joking?" He looked at me skeptical. I shook my head. "But your parents..."

I rolled my eyes at him. "Don't worry about them."

We went upstairs to my room and had sex again. After three hours of sex, Tristan finally fell asleep. I snuggled in his warm chest. I've really missed sleeping next to him, just listening to his heart beat. I closed my eyes pondering off to sleep.

"Good morning, mom. Good morning, dad." I cheerfully said as I walk to the dining room.

"Good-" Nahinto sila pareho ng mag-angat ng tingin. Olivia's eye widened and Harold stiffened up. Lumingon ako sa likod ko at kinuha ang kamay ni Tristan.

"G-good morning, Mr. and Mrs. Cordova." Tristan said while staring at the ground. He couldn't look at them straight in the eyes. Ayaw nga niyang bumaba at pinilit ko lang siya.

"Dito natulog si Tristan kagabi and he's going to join us for breakfast. I hope you don't mind."

Hindi sila sumagot. So I just pulled Tristan and we sat at a vacant chair next to each other. I secretly smiled. This is like a fucking reunion. Reunion ng mga taong sumira sa buhay ko. It was a really awkward breakfast. I was the only one doing all the talking. They couldn't look at each other.

==============
Chapter Thirty Nine

After the awkward breakfast, nagpaalam na si Tristan. I kissed him on the lips in front of my parents. And it wasn't a quick peck on the lips. I wrapped my arms around his neck and gave him a long deep kiss. He pulled away after a few seconds. Then he looked at my parents, who were both staring at us, with apologetic eyes.

He politely said goodbye to them. Olivia just gave him a nod and Harold didn't even look at him. Umalis na si Tristan. I watched him go with my arms crossed across my chest and smiled. Dad got up from his seat and went out of the room. It was just me and Olivia.

She stayed quiet and just looked at me.

"May gusto ka bang sabihin?" I asked her.

"You know about your father's condition, Miranda. Please don't upset him." She said softly.

"Hindi ba ako pwedeng magdala ng kaibigan dito?" I asked innocently.

"What you're doing is immoral. You're a married woman. You shouldn't be fooling around with other men. Paano kung malaman ito ng asawa mo?"

"Immoral? Well, isn't that a bit rich coming from you?" I chuckled. She looked away with guilt on her face. "I can easily get away with it. Jason believes all the lies I tell him."

"What if..." She said in a small voice. "What if you get pregnant again?"

I glower at her. How dare she? How dare she even bring that up? My hand unconciously clenched. I wanted to scream at her but instead I closed my eyes and took a deep breathe to calm myself. "Wala ka nang pakialam doon. Stay out of my business." I said through gritted teeth.

"I'm sorry." I heard her say.

A week after nang unang sexual encounter namin ni Tristan nagpatingin ako sa doctor. We didn't use protection and I was scared I might be pregnant. The result came out negative. I felt relieved but a little part of me was disappointed. I don't want to get pregnant again because I'm scared of losing another baby. Since then, I started taking birth control pills. I had a feeling that it will happen again and I was right.

I went upstairs and checked my phone to find 3 missed calls from Aiko. I called her back immediately.

Tristan's POV

Seven days. It's been seven days since the last time I've seen Andi and I miss her so bad. What we did was wrong. But if right means losing her then I'd rather be wrong. I really wish I could have done things differently before. Sana humanap ako ng ibang paraan, sana hindi ko na siya ibinalik sa mga magulang niya pero gulong-gulo ang isip ko at nabalot ako ng takot ng mga panahong iyon. And now, she's married to another guy.

Hindi ko naman matanong si Phoenix tungkol kay Andi dahil galit siya sa akin dahil sa nakita niya noong social event. Sa tuwing makakasalubong ko siya binibigyan niya ako ng matalim na titig. I wanted to explain to him but I know he wouldn't listen. Matagal na kaming magkaibigan ni Phoenix kaya kilala ko siya. Paniniwala niya lang ang gusto niyang paniwalaan.

"Hi, Cass." Bati ko sa kanya ng makita ko siyang naglalakad sa lobby.

She gave me a faint smile and she sped up her walk, avoiding eye contact with me. Cassie isn't usually like that. Siguro naiilang siya dahil sa paghalik niya sa akin noong nasa party. Phoenix was being an asshole to her at nasaktan si Cassie sa pinagsasabi niya. She probably did it to make him jealous. It did work, didn't it?

Phoenix is still in love with Cassie. And I think Cassie loves him, too. They're just both far too stubborn to admit it. I shook my head. Bakit ba pinoprobelma ko ang love life ng dalawang iyon? I have my own problem. Si Andi. I really want to see her, and talk to her, and hug her, kiss her, make love to her. God, I miss her so much. Pakiramdam ko mababaliw ako kapag hindi ko siya nakita.

Hindi ko naman kayang pumunta sa mansyon ng mga magulang niya. Hindi naman ganun kakapal ang mukha ko. I don't know why Andi did that. Bakit hinarap niya ako sa mga magulang niya at bakit wala man lang nagreact sa kanila. I know they didn't want me there but why didn't they do anything? Nagulat pa ako ng halikan ako ni Andi sa harap nila bago ako umalis at hindi man lang nila kami pinigilan.

Pagkatapos kong matapos ang trabaho sa opisina ay dumiretso ako sa club ni Wayne. I was hoping to see Phoenix there. I needed to talk to him and explain what happened at the party.

"Hey."

Napalingon sila sa akin. Nawala ang ngiti sa labi ni Phoenix. Lahat ay natahimik. He gave me a cold glance before walking pass me.

"Saan ka pupunta?" Tanong ni Wayne kay Phoenix.

"Kailangan ko na umuwi." Sagot niya.

"But you just got here." Si Seth.

"C'mon guys, you two better sort your shit out." Sabi naman ni Axel.

I took a deep breathe and looked at Phoenix. "Alam mo kung may problema ka sa akin sabihin mo."

He glared at me and then smirked. "Bakit mo naman iniisip na may problema ako sa'yo?"

"Yung nakita mo sa party. Iyon ba ang kinagagalit mo?"

"Why would I be mad about that?" His eyes narrowed on me.

"Because you still love her."

He laughed. "I don't love Cassie. She's just some pussy I fucked. If you ant, you can have my leftover."

"You're a fucking coward." I shouted at him. Nagalit talaga ako sa sinabi niya tungkol kay Cassie. She's a nice woman and she doesn't deserve to be treated like this. "Cassie doesn't deserve you cause you're a coward. Ngayon alam ko na kung bakit ka niya pinagpalit sa ibang lalaki noon kasi-"

Bago ko pa matapos ang sasabihin ko ay naramdaman kong dumapo sa pisngi ko ang kamao niya. Napaatras ako habang sapo ang mukha ko. Nang makabawi ako ay agad ko siyang sinugod ng suntok. It turned into a full on fist fight.

Axel, Seth and Wayne were trying to stop us. Seth grab a hold of me and pulled me away from Phoenix. Hinawakan naman siya nina Wayne at Axel. Pilit kumawala siyang kumawala sa pagkakahawak ng dalawa at sinubukan akong sugurin ulit.

"Huwag kayong manggulo dito!" Sigaw ni Wayne. "Kung gusto niyong magpatayan dun kayo sa labas."

They dragged us out of the club.

"Ayusin niyo yan." Bulong sa akin ni Wayne. He patted me on the shoulder before going back to the club.

I looked at Phoenix and he's looking right back at me like he wanted to kill me.

"I didn't mean what I said. I'm sorry." Sabi ko. His face changed from angry to confuse. "I was only trying to knock some sense into you. Do you realize what you're doing? You're letting the woman you love slip away from you because of your goddamn pride. Huwag mo na hintayin may dumating pang iba bago mo ma realize yan. Don't wait until it's too late."

Tumalikod na ako sa kanya at sumakay sa kotse.

Pagkalipas nang ilang araw ay tumawag sa akin si Phoenix. He wanted to meet up with me. Nagkita kami sa isang coffee shop.

"Hey." He nodded. I sat at the chair across him.

"Hey." I said back to him.

He cleared his throat. "I'm sorry for what happened at the club." Sabi niya.

"It's okay. Kasalanan ko rin naman iyon. I provoked you."

"Let's just forget it, ok?"

Tumango ako.

"Pero bago natin kalimutan ang lahat I'd like to make something clear. Cassie is mine, you understand?" He said with a straight face.

I grinned and nodded my head. May bahid ng inis sa mukha ni Phoenix ng ngumisi ako.

"And the kiss. It never happened, ok?" He shot me an annoyed glare.

I smiled even wider. "Ok, got it. It never happened. Never."

Naging okay na ang lahat pagkatapos nun.

"Dude, kumusta si Andi?" Tanong ko sa kanya.

"I don't know I haven't seen or talked to her since that event."

I slumped back into my seat and sighed.

"Please, dude, help me. I want to see her so bad." Kung hihilingin niyang lumuhod ako sa harap niya para tulungan niya ako gagawin ko. I'm that desperate.

"You do know she's already married, right?" Tanong ni Phoenix.

"Yeah." Mahinang sagot ko at tumango-tango ako.

Andi's POV

I lined up with the other models as the music start. The models in front of me started walking out onto the runway. My turn comes up, I took a deep breath and stepped out. And I saw his face. Akala ko namalik-mata lang ako. I looked at him again and I knew I wasn't imagining it. He smiled at me and I knew it was real. I tried to ignore him and focus on my walk.

What the hell is he doing here? When I reached the tip of the runway I striked a pose and turned to walk. Our eyes met again. He smiled at me and the pace of my walk fastened. Oh my god! Oh my god! Oh my god! Was all I could think of as I walk back to the backstage.

Hindi ko na siya tinignan nang lumabas ulit ako sa runway. But I could feel his stare.

"Are you ok?" Tanong sa akin ni Aiko pagpasok ko sa backstage.

"Y-yeah." I tried to smile.

I flew to New York para sa fashion week. I had to do this because I already signed a contract with Calvin Klein. After this fashion show, meron pa akong photoshoots.

"Oh my god, Miranda. You will not believe this." Nakangiting sabi ni Aiko habang nakatingin sa magazine na binabasa niya. We're both getting our makeup done.

"What?"

"Miranda de Veyra, the new sex goddess. The icon of sex and fantasy." She read the article out loud. "This is like the biggest joke of the century." Aiko laughed. "Is it possible to be a sex goddess and be sexless? A sexless sex goddess. Ironic, huh?"

I rolled my eyes at her. Sexless? I wanted to laugh.

After the fashion show, nagbihis na ako ng ordinaryong damit. I started to pack up my stuff.

"Miranda, I have to go. My boyfriend's waiting for me outside." Paalam ni Aiko.

"Okay, bye." Sabi ko. We hugged each other and she left. I met her boyfriend when she picked me up at the airport days ago. He's name is Eric, a lead vocalist of an indie band, they met at a bar a month ago. He seemed like a nice guy. I wonder how long they'll last. Two more weeks, maybe? Wala naman nagtatagal kay Aiko.

Si Aiko ang unang naging kaibigan ko dito sa States. She used to work as a reception at a restaurant and that's where we met. Nag-apply ako bilang waitress sa restaurant na iyon. Naging malapit kami sa isa't isa dahil siguro pareho kaming Filipina. Then we decided to share apartment because I couldn't afford my rent alone. She used to tag me along to parties at siya rin ang nagtulak sa akin mag-model.

"Andi." I froze as I heard that familiar voice.

I slowly turned around and saw him. He had a bouquet of flowers in his hand. Inabot niya sa akin ang bouquet. I slung my bag over my shoulder and walked past him. He followed me out of the room.

"Andi, kailangan kitang makausap." He said.

"Leave me alone." I said with a straight face.

"I thought we were ok."

"You think we're ok just because I had sex with you?" I laughed sarcastically. "It was just sex, plain fucking sex. It's not going to change anything. You're not the only guy I had sex with. And to be honest, you're not that good in bed."

"Mag-usap naman tayo. Pakinggan mo ako." Hinarangan niya ang dadaanan ko. I tried pushing him and he pulled into him and hugged me. "I'm sorry Andi. I'm so sorry. Hindi ko ginustong iwan ka. I love you."

"I hate you. I hate you so much." I choked a sob and closed my eyes. I felt the sincerity in his voice but i can't let myself trust him again and I won't. He's such a good liar. Naniwala na ako sa kanya noon and look what happened!

"I know." He said with a sad voice.

But tonight, I wanted to forget everything. Just for tonight. I cupped his face and kissed him. We hurriedly got out when the cab pulled up.

As soon as the front door shut he kissed me torridly. His hands roamed all over my body. I unbuttoned his jacket and slid it off, still kissing him.

He carried me to my room and layed me on my bed. We started undressing each other until we were both fully naked. He lowered his head, his mouth latched onto my right nipple and started sucking it har like a hungry baby. His one hand went down to my stomach and to my tingling and moist flesh. I arched my back so it would press more against his hand.

We both froze when we heard the doorbell ring.

"Shit!" I pushed him off of me.

"Sino yun?" He asked.

"Si Jason." I answered. Nagdilim ang mukha niya.

Tumayo ako sa kama at hinanap ang robe ko. My phone started ringing and the doorbell rang repeatedly. Hinatak ko si Tristan at ipinasok sa closet.

"D'yan ka lang.Huwag kang lalabas." I said before closing the door.

Lumabas ako ng kwarto at binuksan ang pinto.

"What took you so long to open the door?" He asked as his eyebrows furrowed.

"I-I was in the shower so I didn't hear the doorbell ring."

He smiled and hugged me.

Tristan's POV

Pagkaraan ng 30 minutes ay narinig kong bumukas ang pinto. I peered through the small crack of the louvered closet door. Pumasok si Andi at may sumunod sa kanya. Si Jason. He wrapped his arms around her waist from the back. He gave her small kisses on her neck. I felt my jaw clenched and my hands formed into fists. Gusto kong lumabas sa closet at hatakin palayo si Andi mula sa kanya. He moved the robe off her shoulder and started kissing her there.

I closed my eyes not wanting to see her being kissed by another man. I swallowed the lump in my throat and my eyes stung with tears that were threatening to spill. Hindi ako nakatiis. I opened my eyes again and I saw them on the bed. He was kissing her on the lips. Her arms wrapped around her neck. His hands were running up and down the side of her thigh.

And that was it. Hindi ko na nakayanan. Lumabas ako sa closet at hinatak ko siya sa likod ng shirt niya.

"What the fuck?" Kunot ang noong tumingin siya sa akin.

"Tristan!" Narinig kong sigaw ni Andi.

I was about to throw a punch at him nang bigla akong pigilan ni Andi. She slapped me across the face.

"Get out!" She pushed me. "Get out of my house!"

"Andi." I tried to get closer but she stepped back.

"Aalis ka dito o tatawag ako ng pulis." Sabi ni Jason.

"Umalis ka na dito!" Mariing sabi ni Andi.

I gave her one last look before I said I love her and walked out. My chest tightened with tears as I try to hold it back. I took a deep breath.

=================

Chapter Forty

Nag-uunahang tumulo ang mga luha ko habang naglalakad ako sa gilid nang kalsada. Hindi ko na pinansin ang malamig na hangin na dumadampi sa balat ko. Alam kong si Jason ang mas higit na may karapatan kay Andi dahil kasal sila pero hindi ko napigilan ang sarili kong sugurin siya kanina. Hindi ko kayang masikmurang panoorin si Andi na hinahawakan at hinahalikan ng ibang lalaki na katulad ng paghawak at paghalik ko sa kanya.

I can still see Andi's angry face when she she slapped me across the face and told me to get out of her house. Pakiramdam ko parang pinipiga ang puso ko. It hurts so much that it almost felt like physical pain. Humugot ako ng malalim na hininga para kahit paano ay mabawasan ang paninikip ng dibdib ko. The cold air when through my lungs and I exhaled it. I wonder what they're doing right now. Are they already fucking their brains out? My hands clenched inside my pocket. The thought of that made me want to hit something or someone, specifically, Jason.

I strolled down the street of New York. Pilit kong nilibang ang sarili ko. Ayokong isipin ang posibleng nangyayari ngayon kay Jason at Andi dahil baka iyon pa ang ikabaliw ko. I stopped in front of a bar. I should just probably drown myself in alcohol before I lose my sanity. Pumasok ako sa loob at umupo sa isang stool sa harap ng bar counter. I called the waiter and ordered something to drink.

"Hey." Napalingon ako sa nagmamay-ari ng boses na iyon. It was from a blonde-haired woman sitting beside me. She smiled at me and winked at me and I smiled back at her before downing a shot of whiskey I had in my hand. "I've never seen you here before. You're not from around here, are you?"

I shook my head.

"So, where are you from then?"

"I'm from the Philippines."

"I've never been there but I've heard alot about it." She said. I'm not really in the mood to talk to anyone right now. I wish she would just leave me alone. "Oh by the way, I'm Loise. And you are?"

"Tristan." I said without looking at her. I want to be left alone and I want to stop thinking. I just want to drink and forget about what happened earlier. I want to numb this pain I'm feeling.

"So, Tristan, what brings you to the big apple?" She asked.

"It's a long story." I replied with a sigh.

Ngumiti siya sa akin. "I have plenty of time."

Napilitan akong ikuwento sa kanya ang mga nangyari. Ang pagsunod ko kay Andi dito at sa nangyari kanina. We drank and talk and she let me vent out my feelings. After awhile Loise started getting flirty and touchy-feely with me. I felt her hand stroking my thigh. When I looked at her she gave me a suggestive wink. She then sat on my lap and kissed me. I didn't try to stop, I torridly kissed her back.

Hell! I'm not going to sit here and mope while she's having sex with her husband. That's not fucking fair. We got out of the bar and went to my hotel room. Before I knew it, we were lying on the bed making out and undressing each other.

Andi's POV

Dinampot ko ang jacket na naiwan ni Tristan kagabi. Something fell out of the pocket and I picked it up. A hotel key card and a piece of paper that had his room number on it. He's staying at a hotel near here. Last night, I did the same thing he did to me years ago. Pinagtabuyan ko siya katulad ng ginawa niya sa akin noon. I should feel better dahil nakaganti na ako sa ginawa niya. But I don't. I feel horrible.

Hindi ko naman talaga pinlano ang nangyari kagabi. I didn't know na uuwi pala nang gabing iyon si Jason, I thought he was going to be spending the night at his friends house dahil iyon ang paalam niya sa akin.

I unconsciously bit my lower lips, hindi ko makalimutan ang sinabi niya bago siya umalis. He said he loves me. I shook my head and pushed that thought out of my head. I'm not buying that bullshit anymore. The old stupid Andi was long gone.

"Good morning, wife." Jason came out of the kitchen holding a coffee mug.

"Morning." I said, giving him a slight smile. Jason can be cocky sometimes but he's really a great person. You just have to give him a shot. I thought when I married him my life would be miserable but I was wrong. He had always been there for me when I needed someone, kahit ngayon nandito pa rin siya sa tabi ko para tulungan ako. He helped me put myself back together again.

"You look tired, did you sleep at all?" Tanong niya.

"Of course, I did." I answered. Nagkibit-balikat na lang siya.

"I've already booked our flights for tomorrow." He said, enthusiastically.

"Great!" I tried to sound excited. Gusto kong magdalawang-isip sa gagawin namin. Kaya ko pa bang ituloy ang plano kahit na may sakit si Harold. But then I thought, kulang pa ngang kabayaran iyon sa kinuha nila sa akin. They took my baby's life. Hindi ko alam kung ano ang dapat kong gawin. Nagtatalo ang isip ko. I just need to get some fresh air and think. "I'm just gonna go our for a walk."

I left the house and walked down the street for a few minutes until I found myself hailing a cab and asking the cabby to drive me at the hotel Tristan was staying at. What the hell am I doing? Tanong ko sa sarili ko habang nakaupo sa likod ng cab.

The taxi pulled up in front of the hotel. I made my way into the building and stepped into the elevator. Huminto ang elevator sa floor na pinindot ko. I strolled down the hall and looked for his room number. I slid the key card into the lock and quietly opened the door. Nakasarado ang ilaw at ang kurtina kaya madilim sa loob ng kwarto. Kinapa ko ang switch at binuksan iyon.

I went to his bed and sat on the edge of it. I pulled the covers off him and was shock to see a naked girl lying beside him. For a moment, I saw complete red. My chest heaved up and down really fast.

"You son of a bitch!" Dinampot ko ang unan sa tabi niya at hinampas sa kanya.

"W-what the-" He opened his eyes, looking confused and disoriented. He blinked a few times bago namilog ang mga mata niya. "Andi, a-ano'ng ginagawa mo dito? Paano-"

That bastard! He was having sex with another woman habang hindi ako makatulog kakaisip sa kanya kagabi. I felt my eyes burning. I tried my best to hold my tears back, I wasn't going to let him see me cry. I am so stupid. I can't believe I almost believed his lie!

"What's going on?" The blonde haired slut lifted up her head. She looked at me confused before looking at Tristan. "Who is she?"

Hindi niya pinansin ang babae. He sat up and tried to touch me pero mabilis akong tumayo sa kama. I looked at him with intense anger.

"Andi... I..." He paused, probably thinking of another lie to tell me. I guess wala na siyang maisip when he sighed and cursed.

"You're a fucking liar. May pa- I love you, I love you ka pa! Walanghiya ka."

"I... I think I better go." I heard miss Blondie said before getting up from the bed and picking her clothes up.

I tried to regain my composure. I turned around ready to leave when he grabbed me by the wrist. "You are not going to leave. Mag-uusap tayo."

I tried to free myself from his grip but he wouldn't let me. Hinawakan niya ako hanggang makabihis si blondie at makalabas.

"Is she a prostitute? Did you pick up a prostitute last night?!" My voice boomed all over the room. "Ang cheap mo talaga! Sabagay, dati ka naman call boy kaya bagay na bagay kayo." I couldn't contain my anger and those words just came pouring out of my mouth before I had the chance to even think about it.

"So what if she's a prostitute? Ano bang ikinagagalit mo? Wala naman tayong relasyon. I can have sex with whoever I want." He said in a low, dark voice.

I just stood there, dumbfounded for a moment. I didn't know what to say dahil tama naman siya. I don't have the right na magalit dahil wala naman kaming relasyon. But God, hearing that from him hurts so much.

"Why are you here, anyway? Pumunta ka ba dito dahil hindi ka mapaligaya ng asawa mo?" He said with a smirk. "Tell me I fuck you better than your husband."

Namilog ang mga mata ko. I slapped him across the face for the second time since last night. He pushed me up against the wall and looked at me intensely in the eyes. I placed my hands on his chest and tried pushing him but he wouldn't budge.

"Tristan..."

My eyes grew bigger when I felt his hardness pressing against my stomach. I looked down and there it was, standing proudly. I started to get that tingling sensation in the pit of my stomach. I want that buried inside me. But I suddenly remembered that he slept with a prostitute, I felt my anger coming back and the sensation fading away.

Sinubukan niyang halikan ako sa labi but I turned my head and his lips landed on my cheek.

"Get off me." I whispered, half-heartedly. His hot tongue licked my cheek and I had to bite mine to supress a moan. His one hand cupped my right breast as he began trailing small and light kisses on my cheek.

"Tristan, stop." I said when I felt his lips brushed my earlobe. He then started sucking and nibbling on it and a stifled moan escaped my lips. His hand kneaded my breast while the other one started making its way down. He rubbed me through my jeans causing wet heat to pool in my panties.

"I'm just scratch for your itch, aren't I?" He whispered in my ears with a hint of pain in his voice. His hands went on the button of my jeans and he undid it. Ipinasok niya ang kamay niya sa loob. I bit my lower lips to keep myself from moaning as he touch my wet folds. He traced his finger along my slit over and over. "Is this want you want? Your husband can't get you off?"

A soft moan left my mouth when he placed his finger on my clit and slowly rub it. His lips went down to my neck and sucked on it. I wanted to get lost in his touch but God, he slept with another woman last night. Hindi mawala sa isip ko iyon. I took a deep breath gathering enough strength to push him away.

"Don't you ever touch me again!" I said in a loud shaky voice. Before he could come near me again, tumakbo ako palabas ng hotel room. I heard him calling my name but I ignore him. I ran to the elevator and I pressed the down button. The thirty seconds it took for elevator door to open felt like an eternity. Pinigil ko ang mga luha ko. No, I'm not going to cry for him. I shouldn't cry for someone who isn't worth it

END OF CHAPTER 40